Die Another Day (2002)

Starring: Pierce Brosnan, Judi Dench, John Cleese, Halle Berry, Toby Stephens, Rick Yune, Rosamund Pike, Will Yun Lee, Michael Madsen, Rachel Grant

Director: Lee Tamahori

Genre: Action, Adventure, Thriller

Rating: C

I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this movie.  While it does escape from the evil Soviets plot, the twist did surprise me, and I really liked a lot of the references and allusions to previous Bonds, it was also overly complicated, cheesy, and a bit too much.  Roger Moore said of the film "I thought it just went too far – and that’s from me, the first Bond in space! Invisible cars and dodgy CGI footage? Please!"  That's actually pretty much exactly how I feel.  I like Brosnan overall as a Bond, but this movie in general felt like it should have been a Roger Moore one - and in my opinion, that's not a good thing.

The background to this is that Bond (Brosnan) was captured by the North Koreans while on a mission related to illegally traded African conflict diamonds.  After 14 months of captivity Bond is released in exchange for the release of North Korean agent Zao (Yune), whose face had been disfigured by diamond fragments during the struggle with Bond.  Once released, Bond is suspended from active duty because M (Dench) doesn't believe that he hasn't leaked information, so Bond escapes to complete his mission.  In Havana (because that where you go when your mission involves North Korea) Bond meets NSA agent Giacinti 'Jinx' Johnson (Berry), who he follows (along with Zao) to a gene therapy treatment, where more conflict diamonds are discovered, this time with the company crest of British billionaire Gustav Graves (Stephens).  Bond returns to England to continue the investigation, where he meets fellow MI6 agent Miranda Frost (Pike), who is undercover as Graves' assistant.  Points if you guess who's sleeping with who!

There's a lot about this movie that is really classic Bond and in a way, I admire Tamahori for trying to recreate that feel of the series.  The problem is, however, that you really can't go back.  What made movies like Dr. No work only worked because of the time in which they were created.  Outside of the sixties and seventies, classic Bond doesn't work as well; that was one of the problems of the Roger Moore films.  Die Another Day fails even more because in addition to trying to grasp that classic feel it also tries to incorporate new technology, namely CGI.  The result is rather disastrous.  No, the result is horrendous.  Actually, there's more to it than that.  Another part of the problem is that while trying to envoke a lot of the old classic feel Die fails to intentionally invoke the humour and the cheese.  As such, it's a lame and cheesy movie that fails to realize it's as much.  It's okay to be ridiculous, when you know that's what you're doing - that's why Dr. Strangelove is so awesome.  If you take yourself seriously but fail to be serious, you just don't work out in the end.

New Year's Eve (2011)

Stars: Halle Berry, Jessica Biel, Jon Bon Jovi, Abigail Breslin, Ludacris, Robert De Niro, Josh Duhamel, Zac Efron, Héctor Elizondo, Katherine Heigl, Ashton Kutcher, Seth Meyers, Lea Michele, Sarah Jessica Parker, Michelle Pfeiffer, Til Schweiger, Hilary Swank, Sofía Vergara

Director: Gary Marshall
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Rating: C-

When you get an ensemble cast like the one in New Year's Eve you should be able to expect something good.  There are a lot of big names in this film and so despite it being a romantic comedy you should be able to expect it to be something great - you look at a movie like Love Actually and expect something great.  New Year's Eve is a failure in that sense; despite having a stellar cast, it's really not that good of a movie.  In fact, I doubt the word 'good' should be used at all when discussing this film.

New Year's Eve is a series of vignettes set on, surprise-surprise, December 31st, in New York.  Swank plays the Vice-President of the Times Square Alliance and is in charge of the ball dropping on time - the biggest event of the year for Times Square.  Despite the importance of her job, however, there's a meeting at midnight that she's debating going to, as is encouraged by her friend Ludacris. Berry is a nurse caring for terminal patient De Niro, who speaks fondly of memories of seeing the ball drop and only wants to see it happen once more before he dies.  Elsewhere in the hospital, parents-to-be Biel and Meyers are anxious for their baby to be born, even more so when fellow expecting parent Schweiger lets slip that the hospital gives a huge bonus to the first baby born in the hospital in the new year.  Pfeiffer is a wallflower of a woman who has quit her job and hired Efron in order to help her make a list of New Year's resolutions come true.  Meanwhile, Bon Jovi is attempting to rekindle his romance with ex-girlfriend Heigl.  Upstate, Duhamel is stranded after a friend's wedding; he must get back into the city in time to give a speech at a ball, but there's the memory of a girl he met on New Year's Eve the year before, and a promise to meet her again that's hanging over him.  Parker is a somewhat highly strung single mother who is planning to do nothing on New Year's Eve but watch the ball drop on television with her daughter, much to daughter Breslin's disappointment - she was hoping to go to Times Square, without her mother, and experience her first kiss.  Oh, and Kutcher and Michele get stuck in the elevator to their building.

There are two major signs in that this movie isn't good; first of all, I skimmed a lot and yet I still had to write 300 words to summarize the film, and second of all, without going onto Wikipedia, IMDb, or another website, I am unable to tell you the name of a single character in the film (other than Jon Bon Jovi's Jensen, whose name is said a lot).  There are so many characters and different plots in this movie that it's hard to summarize it with less.  There's a lot going on, and as a result you really don't get the chance to know and love nay of the characters.  The only character who I really felt like I understood and had a feel for were De Niro and Berry; I was really moved by his struggles and desires and the way that he hopes to make it to midnight.  Beyond that, though, none of the characters were particularly moving.  Sure, some of the stories had potential and could have been great if they were developed more... but in the span of a single movie there was just way too much going on.  You didn't get the chance to care about the characters - you didn't get the chance to learn their names.

The only way that this film is able to really be coherent despite the lack of development is the fact that New Year's Eve borrows heavily from plots of other movies.  The guy who proposes to his girlfriend, gets cold feet and runs, then tries to make things up?  I've seen it.  The couple who's competing with another couple over something ridiculous? Seen it.  The guy who's in love with the woman that he's met once years ago? Seen it. Dying guy wants to make things right with his family?  Wallflower who finally works up the nerve to pursue her life long dreams? Person who has a major deadline for work and has to deal with things going wrong?  Mother has to figure out how to deal with her teenager? Seen it, seen it, seen it, seen it.  Oh, and pair who've never met before get stuck somewhere and have to deal (and of course fall in love)?  Yeah, seen that one too. My suggestion for anyone debating seeing New Year's Eve is to watch Love Actually if you're looking for a touching holiday-themed movie filled with love and vignettes or see one of the many other romantic comedies out there that focus on at most a couple plots and actually develop them.