Recommendations: August 17

Sparkle - I've been seeing the trailers for this a lot lately, and I'm not entirely sure what to make of it yet.  It looks kind of like another Dream Girls except with Whitney Houston... and, honestly, the Whitney Houston part of the equation is probably enough to get me to see it.

The Expendables 2 - The follow up to The Expendables, this movie is trying to prove that there is no such thing as too many older action starts in one movie.  I have no clue what this is about, but I'm totally looking forward to seeing it.

The Hunger Games - The hit movie, based on the hit book, is now available on DVD.  If you didn't see it in theatres, check it out.  If you did see it in theatres, see it again.

Jaws - The classic horror film is being re-released on Blu-Ray, DVD, Digital Combo, and Amazon Instant Video as a part of Universal's 100th Anniversary celebrations.  Just in time to ensure that you don't go to the beach.

The Gargoyle - This book did a bit of a number on me when I read it.  By author Andrew Davidson it tells the story of this cynical and formerly gorgeous male porn star who's in a horrific car crash that horribly scars him.  During his slow recovery he meets Marianne Engel who insists that they were lovers in medieval Germany, and begins to spin their tale.  This is an amazingly written book that makes you question the reality in which it is based the entire time.  I totally recommend it.

Thunderball (1965)

Starring: Sean Connery, Claudine Auger, Adolfo Celi, Luciana Paluzzi, Rik Van Nutter, Desmond Llewelyn, Bernard Lee

Director: Terence Young

Genre: Action, Adventure, Thriller

Rating: B

I think the problem with going back and watching the James Bond movies is that while some of the tropes that they used in the series weren’t necessarily old and clichéd at the time they certainly are now.  Some of the situations that Bond gets into kind of seem a bit ridiculous and over the top – more fodder for an Austin Powers movie than an actual serious action flick.  There is no single part of Thunderball that really stands out as great, although there are a few that kind of stand out as corny – notably the jetpack, the underwater jet pack, the sharks, and the underwater sex.  I realize that sex is necessary in a Bond film, I’m just saying that this sex was particularly lame.

Thunderball sees the return of SPECTRE.  The terrorist organization has succeeded in apprehending two atomic bonds, for which they are demanding a £100 million ransom – if their demands are not met then a major city in either the United Kingdom or the United States will be destroyed.  Everyone’s favourite MI6 agent, Bond (Connery), takes up the task of finding the bombs without having to pay the ransom.  Bond decides to follow Domino (Auger), the sister of the now dead French NATO pilot who had been responsible for the bombs, and discovers that she is the mistress of SPECTRE No. 2, Emilio Largo (Celi).  It’s only a matter of time before Bond succeeds in seducing Domino and defeating Largo.

Despite the fact that there’s nothing out- standing about this film and the fact that there are more than a few corny bits, I actually kind of enjoyed Thunderball.  It’s lame, but it’s fun, and that’s everything that I expect from an action movie.  They’re not supposed to be deep, introspective films, they’re  supposed to be fun and escapist.  There is nothing about Thunderball that is remotely believable and the special effects are ridiculously lame – although forgivable given that it was filmed in the 60s – but that’s okay.  In my  opinion there are two Sean Connery images that should go down in everyone’s memory as the epitome of good actors making the best of a movie – one is the rather infamous image of him in Zardoz and the other is the image of him in the jet pack in Thunderball.  Seriously – I don’t usually use screenshots, but I had to for this.

 

The film does take a long time to get started, but I’ve kind of been feeling that in general with these movies.  The underwater sequences weren’t the best… but underwater sequences are never the best.  They did have sharks, but at least they didn’t have lasers on their heads.  I think that might actually be the reason why I liked this movie – it wasn’t all that great, but at least it wasn’t Austin Powers.  I’m now going to re-evaluate my enjoyment of Thunderball.

Hope Springs (2012)

Starring: Meryl Streep, Tommy Lee Jones, Steve Carrell

Director: David Frankel

Genre: Comedy, Romance

Rating: B+

I was pleasantly surprised by this movie.  I went in expecting to enjoy it, heck even really enjoy it, but I suspected that a large part of my enjoyment was going to be the result of my overall enjoyment of bad romantic comedies.  There have been more than a few movies that, while I gave them poor ratings here I really enjoyed watching and look forward to seeing again.   I've seen each of the High School Musical movies more times than I care to admit and yet the highest rating I've given any of them was a C+.  Hope Springs however was actually genuinely really good.

Hope Springs is about Kay (Streep) and Arnold (Jones) Soame, a pair of empty nesters who have been married for thirty-one years.  For a number of years the pair have been sleeping in separate rooms and, in Kay's opinion, have essentially become two lonely people who just happen to share the same house.  Finally she decides to make the necessary change and forces Arnold to go to an intensive couple's therapy with Dr. Bernard Feld (Carell) in a coastal town in Maine.  The question is, are they able to let go of their reservations and the past and revitalize their marriage?

My favourite part about this movie was the chemistry between Streep and Jones.  I've seen Streep in romantic and comedic roles before, but I've never seen Jones in a rom-com and wasn't really sure what to expect from him.  He's the grumpy old man... and really, that's exactly who he is in Hope Springs.  He's a grumpy old man married to a reserved old woman, filling very much the stereotypical roles that we've created for people of their generation.  There's actually something about Kay that kind of reminded me of June Cleaver, although for a more modern era.  Even as the two are struggling to over come their problems, or struggling to continue to deny the existence of said problems, there's amazing chemistry between them.  It's the little touches and the little looks that they exchange.  Streep provides a lot of this, but when Arnold is talking about his wife it's done in such a manner that you can't help but see the love that this man feels for his wife.  Despite the fact that Jones isn't really a comedic actor I found a lot of the humour of the film was the result of him. He just has the way of giving a look that is so perfectly hilarious.

I was also really pleased by Carell's role.  As I've said before, I'm always a bit iffy about him going into a movie.  Sometimes he leaves me happy and sometimes he leaves me thoroughly disappointed.  This time he really surprised me.  His role was subtle and not exactly like what he's done before.  This time Carell was someone who was stable and successful.  He really pulled off therapist well.

I think the thing that I liked about this the most was the fact that there were no ridiculous gags or goofy bits.  There were no big fights or any over the top scenes, instead it's this subtle, sweat journey as the distance between the couple both widens and shrinks as the film progresses - as seen very literally in the way that they sit on the couch at their therapy sessions and their other interactions.  It's all very cute, very sweet, and very real.

Haywire (2012)

Starring: Gina Carano, Michael Fassbender, Ewan McGregor, Bill Paxton, Channing Tatum, Antonio Banderas, Michael Douglas, Michael Angarano

Director: Steven Soderberg

Genre: Action, Thriller

Rating: C+

I was a bit disappointed with this movie.  I didn’t expect it to be some stellar film with amazing acting that really wowed me or anything… but based on the trailers I was expecting it to be a highly intense action flick.  You know, lots of fighting scenes and a plot that didn’t really matter.  Watching Haywire, however, provided a rather different movie.  It was intense, but slow.  There was a lot of plot and it was all very important… but I didn’t really care about it.  I didn’t care about the characters.  The film didn’t really give me any reason to care about them and whether they live or die.  It seems almost like the film is counting on the viewers having a pre-existing emotional attachment to the characters because of any attachment to the actors.   It’s rather a juvenile approach to filmmaking: it’s like not developing the Robert Pattinson character, because hey it’s Edward Cullen and therefore you have to love him (note, I’ve only actually seen two non-Twilight R-Pattz movies, neither of which did this, so it’s not the best comparison. But, really, given the attitude of some Twihards, I could see this happening).

Haywire follows Mallory Kane (Carano), who is some sort of secret operative who… kills people? Sometimes for the government? I’m not really sure.  The film is told partially in flashbacks and we learn that a week ago Mallory was assigned to rescue Jiang (Anthony Brandon Wong) in Barcelona, requiring her to pose as the wife of British MI6 agent Paul (Fassbender).  Nothing is really what it seems, however, and after Paul kills Jiang things all go to shit for Mallory.  She ends up on the run from the company, which is headed by her ex-boyfriend Kenneth (McGregor), who are all hell bent on killing her.

Once again, I didn’t care about the characters.  I didn’t care for Mallory, who I didn’t know from anything else.  I also didn’t care about Paul, Kenneth, John Kane (Paxton), Aaron (Tatum), Rodrigo (Banderas), Coblenz (Douglas), or even Scott (Angarano), who I’ve seen in many movies and for the most part really enjoy the actors.  Yet, while I care about (most of) these actors, I didn’t care about their characters.  I didn’t wonder what their greater motives were or why they were trying to kill Mallory (those of them that were), although the reasons that I did find were kind of stupid.  The film found this way of being both overly simplistic and overly complicated at the same time, and not in a good way.  Some really simple movies are great, likewise with some really complicated movies.  In fact, despite my frequent criticism of overly complicated movies, I tend to love things that are hugely complex.  It’s just when it doesn’t work out or things become lost in the confusion that I grow unhappy.  This is what happened in Haywire – things were lost in the confusion, most notably the character development.

Moving on is the fact that this movie presented itself as being this highly packed action flick.  It isn’t a highly packed action flick.  Sure there are a few action sequences, but a lot of the time it’s this slow, dramatic thing.  It’s a really quiet movie, equating long periods of characters moving and saying nothing, accompanied by tension building music in order to create suspense.  For me it didn’t create suspense, it was just annoying.  Having read other reviews of the movie, I find it kind of funny that one of the compliments Haywire has received is the lack of action sequences and special effects.  I guess, to each their own.  I do enjoy a good thriller, but I don’t think this was that.  I also enjoy a good action film, filled with action sequences and special effects, which I felt is what this presented itself as.  Haywire ended up being neither, and in the end I was just disappointed.

The Scottish Prisoner

Author: Diana Gabaldon

Genre: Historical, Mystery, Fantasy

Rating: A-

In the course of The Scottish Prisoner Lord John Gey and Jamie Frasier team up in order to arrest a dishonourable Englishman and maybe stop a Jacobean plot on the way.  The plot is as such: after returning to London Grey receives a package of letters that detail the illegal doings of Major Gerald Siverly, who Grey and his brother, the Duke of Pardloe, decide needs to be brought to London for justice – a task which requires journeying to Ireland.  Within the package is a poem written in Irish Gaelic, so Pardloe summons Frasier in order to translate it as best as possible.  While all this is going on, Frasier has also been approached by Irishman Tobias Quinn, who he knew before the Rising of 45.  Quinn talks of another Rising, this one in Ireland, and it doesn’t take a genius to put one and two together to see where this plot is going.

In the course of The Scottish Prisoner Lord John Gey and Jamie Frasier team up in order to arrest a dishonourable Englishman and maybe stop a Jacobean plot on the way.  The plot is as such: after returning to London Grey receives a package of letters that detail the illegal doings of Major Siverly, who Grey and his brother, the Duke of Pardloe, decide needs to be brought to London for justice – a task which requires journeying to Ireland.  Within the package is a poem written in Irish Gaelic, so Pardloe summons Frasier in order to translate it as best as possible.  While all this is going on, Frasier has also been approached by Irishman Tobias Quinn, who he knew before the Rising of 45.  Quinn talks of another Rising, this one in Ireland, and it doesn’t take a genius to put one and two together to see where this plot is going.

I think this novel really tied up some of the loose ends of the previous Lord John books, particularly in regards to the friendship between the two men.  Having read the Outlander books I know that they become good friends again, and The Scottish Prisoner shows just how they do so.  Things might not be exactly perfect between the two of them at novel’s end, but I at least have an idea of how they’re going to end up at the point of friendship that they’re at by Drums of Autumn.  I am getting a bit bored of the Jacobean threat plot line in the Grey books, it seems to pop up every other book or so.  At the same time, though I only have one more story (to date) in the Lord John series to read, and I suspect that Gabaldon will have to stretch a bit to write a story connecting Jacobeans and zombies.  While this wasn’t my favourite story in the series, I did like it, overall.  For the most part it was able to really stand on its own, although as usual there are many references to events both in earlier Lord John novels and in Voyager, so I wouldn’t recommend skipping over them before reading this one – even if Gabaldon’s note at the start of the novel says otherwise.

The Custom of the Army

Author: Diana Gabaldon

Genre: Historical, Mystery, Novella

Rating: C+

I’m not entirely sure the purpose of “The Custom of the Army.”  The pretense of the plot is as such: While attending an electric eel party (which involves connecting as many people as possible then having one brave soul touch an electric eel) Lord John Grey enters into a scuffle over a lady’s honour, which results in a duel.  The next day it is revealed that the man with which Grey duelled is dead, his father demanding that Grey be tried for murder – and the lady’s father demanding that Grey enter into a marriage for the sake of his daughter’s honour.  Rather conveniently at the same time a letter appears requesting that Grey serve as a witness to the court martial of one Captain Charles Carruthers, in Canada.  Deciding that the wilderness of Canada is a much safer place than London society, Grey very quickly decides to flee the country.  This journey gives Grey the opportunity to reunite with his new cousin-in-law, last seen in Lord John and the Private Matter, and partake in the British Conquest of New France.

When I say the pretense of the plot, however, I really do mean the pretense.  The reason for which Grey goes to Canada in the first place are rather flimsy and quickly forgotten.  As is common with the Lord John series, matters are for the most part nicely wrapped up by the end of the story, but I found that I wasn’t really happy with the resolution.  It just seemed a bit too forced, too rushed.  Almost as though Gabaldon had intended to write a much longer story, but realized that for this anthology she could not do so.  As such, rather than really developing the plot she just kind of winged it, wrapping everything up like an afterthought, or like a present that you buy at a gas station on the way to Christmas dinner.  The characters in the story are, as always, excellently written, but the story is lacking.  Where “Custom” does succeed, however, is as an in between.  It provides a good connector between its predecessor, "Lord John and the Haunted Soldier" and its successor, The Scottish Prisoner.

Week in Review: August 6 - 11

Movies - Two new movies of the week: Step Up Revolution and Total Recall.  The later was coupled with the original Total Recall as well, and to round things out we had Goldfinger.  The only one that I didn't really enjoy was Goldfinger, while the best was the original Total Recall.

Books - This week we did the doubly whammy of The Princess Bride and its unfinished sequel Buttercup's Baby.  It was a re-read for both, and I found that I was actually rather disappointed by it.  Neither was as good as I remembered.

TV - TV show of the week was the 2003 Star Wars: Clone Wars.  I wasn't a huge fan; I think you'd have to be a big Star Wars fan in order for watching this to be worth it.

Recommendations - This week's recommendations were The Bourne Legacy and Hope Springs.  I'm still a bit hesitant about Bourne, but I'm really looking forward to Hope.

Next Week - Next week we've got Hope Springs and the next James Bond movie, Thunderball.  Bookwise will be The Custom of the Army and The Scottish Prisoner, the next two in the Lord John series.

Requests - What about you?  Any books, TV shows, movies, whatever, that you'd like to see me review?  Let me know in the comments.

Star Wars: Clone Wars

Starring: Mat Lucas, James Arnold Taylor, Tom Kane, Grey DeLisle, Anthony Daniels, Corey Burton, André Sogliuzzo, Daran Norris, Nick Jameson

Creator: Genndy Tartakovsky and George Lucas

Genre: Serial, Sci-Fi, Action, Adventure

Rating: C

This is not the way that Star Wars should be depicted.  While a serialized animated TV series is possible for the story that is Star Wars, the way that this rendition of Clone Wars was done was just wrong.  And bad.  And wrong.  Really, really, really wrong.  Star Wars: Clone Wars is a series of 20 three-minute and 5 twelve to fifteen minute instalments, aired over a course of three seasons; the entire thing can be viewed in about two hours.  At the end of the two hours you’ll not quite feel as though you’ve wasted your time in watching this movie, but you won’t exactly feel good about it.

The first two seasons focus on Obi-Wan Kenobi (Taylor) and Anakin Skywalker (Lucas) in the assault against the planet Muunilist, with Obi-Wan on the planet and Anakin in the space battle above it.  Count Doku (Burton) has taken in a new apprentice, Asajji Ventress (DeLisle), who he assigns to assassinate Anakin.  In the third season, following his promotion to Jedi Knight, Anakin and Obi-Wan are assigned to find General Grievous (DiMaggio) on Nelvaan, while Grievous assaults Coruscant and tries to kidnap Supreme Chancellor Palpatine (Jameson).

There are several problems that I have with this rendition of Star Wars.  First, let's start with the characters.  I'm not going to say that they're poorly drawn or anything, but I will put it out there that a good number of the characters don't exactly look like their motion picture counterpart.  Call it nitpicking if you want, but when I see Anakin Skywalker, I expect to be able to identify him as Anakin Skywalker.  The same goes for Obi-Wan Kenobi, Padmé, General Grievous, and so on.  There was actually a moment when I was watching Grevious and thought "it's weird that they would introduce another droid Sith" before realizing that he wasn't just another droid Sith but the droid Sith.  When watching something like this, especially as short as this is, I don't want to have to spend my time re-figuring out who all the characters are.  Oh, also, the voice work sucked.  Seriously.  Mat Lucas succeeded in making Anakin Fucking Skywalker more annoying.  That's not an easy feat.

Beyond the characters, whoever, there's the plot.  Or rather, the lack of plot.  While I will agree that there were a few really nice action sequences, the fact that the entire thing is pretty much one action sequence after another gets old, and fast.  Star Wars is awesome not because of the action but because of the story.  Sure, we've all made lightsaber noises in our lives, but I doubt as often as we've said "Luke, I am your father," or quoted Yoda.  Yoda quotes is what makes Star Wars Star Wars.  There aren't any memorable Yoda quotes in this rendition, because there aren't any memorable really anything in it.  It's just "here's this action sequence, and oh, here's this action sequence, and plot? what plot?"  The one thing I will give Clone Wars - along with its much more successful counterpart, Star Wars: The Clone Wars - is that it does shine more of a light on characters we don't know as well.  It isn't just the Obi-Wan and Anakin Chronicles, there are a lot of other lesser character swho gain prominince here.  This trend is continued in The Clone Wars, especially as the Clones themselves become major characters.

Recommendations: August 10

The Bourne Legacy - The newest instalment in the Bourne series, this one follows Jeremy Renner as a super spy gone wrong.  I'm planning on seeing this movie, but I'm not really sure what to expect from it.  I'm not big on the "let's do this series past where it naturally ended just because hey! Money!" Which is what Bourne Legacy (and the non-Robert Ludlum Bourne novels) feels like.

Hope Springs - I know it's kind of sad, but this is the movie that I'm really looking forward to this week.  Hope Springs brings together Meryl Streep, Tommy Lee Jones, and Steve Carrell, in a movie about seniors reconnecting. And having sex.  I enjoy Meryl Streep romantic comedies, so I'm sure I'm going to enjoy this.

The Lorax - The latest Seussical movie.  This was far from being the worst Seuss, but it wasn't the best.  Good to watch if you want something light.

Grosse Pointe Blank - It's the 15th anniversary of this John Cusack classic, so it's being re-released.  I've always really enjoyed this one.

High Fidelity - Another Cusack classic also now on Blu-ray (although not for anything fancy like an anniversary).

Romy and Michele's High School Reunion - There are no words to explain just how awesome this movie is.  It's not really highly rated, but it's funny and fun, and so who cares if it's actually good?  It's ridiculous and over the top, but it's also Lisa Kudrow at her best.

Girl with the Dragon Tattoo - I recently succeeded in getting a friend to read this book, and it's one that I think everyone should read.  It's a bit slow to start and there's a lot of details that can be difficult to absorb, but once you get into it it's an amazing read - totally worth the journey.  If you haven't read this book yet, you definitely need to check it out.

Step Up Revolution (2012)

Starring: Kathryn McCormick, Ryan Guzman, Misha Gabriel, Peter Gallagher

Director: Scott Speer

Genre: Drama, Romance, Music

Rating: C

Over the course of four movies the Step Up franchise has shown us how the power of dance can overcome all of the world's evils: poverty, evil overbearing parental figures, and poverty.  What?  There are no other evils in the world, and dancing of course solves all.

Step Up Revolution takes the franchise out of New York and into Miami.  Here longtime friends Sean (Guzman) and Eddie (Gabriel) have formed a flash mob dance group, called The Mob.  The group is part of some sort of Youtube contest, where the first video to get to ten million hits whens a butt load of money.  Enter Emily Anderson (McCormick), the daughter of real-estate tycoon Bill Anderson (Gallagher).  Bill is trying to buy up a lot of land in Miami where the Mob's community lives so that he can build a new fancy hotel.  The Mob is against this and as is Emily - Emily dreams of being a dancer, while her father is trying to push her into entering into business with him.  She chooses dance, and in doing so begins to help The Mob politicize their dance, and embarks on a relationship with Sean.

You don't go to a Step Up movie for the plot.  Really, the plot's been some variation of the same thing for the last three movies (which in turn were only a twist of the plot in the first movie), and the actors are hired more for their dance ability than their acting. Their dance ability, by the way, is awesome.  I mean it, some of these people are phenomenal dancers and the stuff that they do just blows your mind.  In each of the Step Up movies there's one dance that just amazes you - in this one my favourite was when they flash mob the art gallery (and the way the curator reacts made me think that the group could have regularly done that and it'd be fine).  The movie is worth checking out for that one scene.  I did, however, have a problem with the 3D in this movie; it looked a bit shoddy at parts and made some of the shooting a bit shaky.  When the important part about a movie is the dancing it's kind of a bad thing when the effects added to it really take away from said dancing.

What else to say about this movie... the acting is not that great.  This is the first movie for the two leads, McCormick and Guzman, and the first major role for Gabriel, so I guess you can't really expect too much.  I wasn't disappointed in them so much as I was disappointed in Peter Gallagher.  The rest of the cast was a bunch of dancers just venturing into the acting scene.  Peter Gallagher's been around for awhile now and I kind of wonder why he does movies like this - kind of, until I look at his actual filmography and see that most of his movies aren't exactly blockbusters.  Peter, really, just say no to sequels.

Total Recall (1990)

Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Rachel Ticotin, Sharon Stone, Michael Ironside, Ronny Cox

Director: Paul Verhoeven

Genre: Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

Rating: B+

This is what a classic science fiction, action movie looks like.  The special effects and the futuristic world are totally ridiculous and the acting isn't the best (hey, it's stars Arnold), but the script is great, the movie is smart, and the characters envoke emotion.

For some time, Earth construction worker Douglas Quaid (Shwarzenegger) has been having a reoccurring dream about Mars and a mysterious woman there (Ticotin).  He expresses a desire to go there despite it's political problems, which his wife Lori (Stone) and everyone around him discourages.  Finally he decides to visit Rekall, a place where memories are implanted into your brain - he selects the spy mission to Mars.  Except, while he's under something begins to go wrong and suddenly it appears that Quaid is in fact a spy from Mars whose memory was wiped and everyone, from the governor of the colony of Mars, Vilos Cohaagn (Cox), and his chief lieutenant, Richter (Ironside), to Quaid's wife are trying to kill him.  Quaid must fight to survive and figure out just who he is, and maybe get back the woman of his dreams, before being killed himself - or, is it all a dream, implanted into his mind by Rekall?

Total Recall was all about screwing with our minds and making us doubt the entire premise of a movie years before Christopher Nolan had even thought about Inception.  Even at the end of the film you're not really sure whether or not Quaid's adventure was real and if he is in fact just having some paranoid delusion while strapped into a chair in Rekall.  It's the ultimate spinning top.  But paranoid delusion or not, the film has you on the edge of your seat hoping that Quaid's going to survive and get the girl and the whole shebang.  You hope that this is really happening and isn't just the delusions of some Average Joe - because, really, Arnold Schwarzenegger could totally pass as an Average Joe.

Really, actually I think that's the biggest flaw in this movie, the idea of Arnold being some construction worker nobody.  It's the one improvement that the remake made - sure, Colin Farrell's hot and that'll make him stand out in a crowd, but in the land of a Hollywood movie where everyone's beautiful, at least he isn't built like Schwarzenegger.  I mean, the guy doesn't really blend into a crowd, which is kind of essential to the plot of Total Recall.  But if that's my biggest complaint, that Schwarzenegger doesn't blend into a crowd and look like he could pass as Average Joe, then it just goes to show how good this movie is.  It's not my only complaint - I do hate how lame all the technology is - but it's the only one that's really founded.  The technology may be big and bulky and look like it belongs on the set of Star Trek: The Original Series instead of a movie from the early nineties, but at the same time technology then really did look like that.  Total Recall's technology in itself isn't really trying to look like what future technology should look like, but rather be 'futuristic' in style - Mars Rover or not, Man has not colonized another planet, nor can they stick electronic tracking devices up people's noses, or implant memories in their brains.  It might not look futuristic to us, but it still is futuristic.

Total Recall (2012)

Starring: Colin Farrell, Kate Beckinsale, Jessica Biel, Bryan Cranston, Jon Cho, Bill Nighy

Director: Len Wiseman

Genre: Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

Rating: B-

I'm a little ashamed to admit it, but I actually really enjoyed this movie.  The acting isn't superb, the plot is weak at points, it's not really moving on an emotional level or funny or anything.  At its core, Total Recall is a mindless action flick set in a dystopian future.  It isn't meant to have a great plot or great acting or connect on an emotional level (the lack of funny, however, is a bit of a disappointment).  It's supposed to have awesome chase scenes, mind blowing special effects, and cool gun fights.  Total Recall has all of this and more - in addition to it all, it also has this awesome futuristic world.  Sure the science is sketchy, but damnit, it's science fiction.  The science doesn't have to be right, it's fiction.

Total Recall follows factory worker Douglas Quaid (Farrell) as he begins to realize that his life is not exactly what it seems.  After a series of nightmares in which he is a spy of some sorts running from the police, Quaid decides to visit Rekall, a company that implants memories into its clients.  You can go anywhere, do anything, be anything.  While he's at Rekall, however, things go horribly wrong and before he's even put under it's revealed that Quaid is in fact a spy, who worked for a resistance movement.  From here his life goes to shit as his wife, Lori (Beckinsale), reveals that she isn't really his wife but rather a cop who's been assigned to watch him.  Quaid must flee from her, and by extension the entire paramilitary police force of both the United Federation of Britain (UFB) and the Colony (otherwise known as Australia), the only two habitual land masses on the planet.  Oh, and in it all, the girl from his dreams, Melina (Biel), appears.

The plot and characters in Total Recall are somewhat weak.  There isn't really the emotional connection between them and the viewer that the original film had.  I will give the film a lot of credit, however, in that it doesn't just totally rip off the original movie; while it follows the same basic plot and much of the general storyline, it also goes on a number of different directions.  This Total Recall is a lot more political than its predecessor, although never in a really original way.  It's very much anti-militaristic totalitarian and rather pro-workers, which is pretty much what you expect of a movie like this.  There's a lot of development towards this aspect of the plot, just not the characters themselves - I actually don't think I would have known the name of Biel's character if not for Wikipedia (and the fact that it's the same name as used in the 1990 version).

That being said, though, the movie's fun.  The special effects are cool, the chase scenes are hot. Every action movie is pretty much required to have a chase scene at one point or another, and in Total Recall it does so with hover cars.  Hover car chase scenes are the best.  The science is a bit wonky, but who cares - they go through the center of the earth.  Going through the center of the earth is always awesome.  The thing with the original Total Recall is that, while it's got a good plot and is emotionally charged the futuristic elements are rather lame and dated.  It's something that's a bit characteristic of older science fiction movies, which makes them a bit annoying to watch in the present day.  In this Total Recall, however, everything is slick and smooth and very much along the lines of what the future would look like if current trends continue.  I'm sure in another twenty years I'll be saying that the futuristic technology used in this Total Recall is rather old, dated, and lame when they remake the movie again, but for now it looked damn awesome.

I think, though, that my favourite part of this movie was the way that it differed from the original film while also paying tribute to it.  There's no Mars, but they mention it.  There's no huge brothel, but there's still a three breasted prostitute (no midget prostitute, however, sorry).  There's a fat woman who's travelling to the UFB for two weeks.  There are more moments like this, and to be honest every time they happened I smiled.  I enjoyed them.  Total Recall knew it was a remake of an older classic and assumes that you've seen the original.  It doesn't try to be some grand, fantastic movie.  It's a mindless action flick, and it does mindless action damn well.

Goldfinger (1964)

Starring: Sean Connery, Gert Fröbe, Honor Blackman, Harold Sakata, Bernard Lee

Director: Guy Hamilton

Genre: Action, Adventure, Thriller

Rating: B-

I wasn't really a big fan of this movie.  In fact, I kind of didn't enjoy this instalment of the series.  Sure there were some amazing moments, but a lot of the movie was gimmicky and cheesy.  I mean, really, there was a long heated game of golf.  Serious movies that feature golf are not good.  It's like a rule, or something.

Goldfinger follows Bond (Connery) as he follows bullion dealer Auric Goldfinger (Fröbe) in an attempt to determine how Goldfinger is smuggling gold internationally.  This involves playing golf and cards - played in a manner that really make Bond look like a jackass - screwing women, and the like.  Eventually Bond determines that Goldfinger is planning on robbing Fort Knox and must stop him.  Along the way Bond screws some women and people are killed with a hat.  Yes, a hat.

Okay, so the awesome moments of this movie include when Shirley Eaton is killed by having her body covered in gold - this isn't a huge spoiler because it's basically the poster image for this movie.  The gold chick you see in everything Goldfinger related?  Yeah, that's Shirley Eaton.  There's also the gadgets, which for the most part are pretty cool, and Goldfinger tells Bond that he wants him to die, while pointing a laser at his crotch.  That moment is, in my opinion, probably the single most iconic moment of a James Bond film.  Sure there's "Bond, James Bond" and "Shaken, not stirred" but they're more catch phrases that you hear in most, if not all, of the films.  "I expect you to die" is just so iconic of this film, this series, this genre... it sent chills up my spine when it happened.

Despite that, however, the film was actually rather boring.  It was slow, and despite only running for 2 hours seemed to last forever.  I found that I really just didn't care about this movie.  I spent most of it hoping that it would be over soon and disappointed to see that it wasn't.  Maybe a combination of the heat and school related stress are getting to me, because any reviews that I've read of Goldfinger say that it's a great movie, I just found it uninteresting.  It wasn't a bad movie it just... didn't captivate me.

Buttercup's Baby

Author: William Goldman

Genre: Fantasy, Adventure, Romance, Comedy

Rating: C-

I really didn't enjoy Buttercup's Baby.  I get that it's incomplete (and likely to stay that way), but it just didn't captivate me.  Instead, really it did the opposite: it took characters that I (for the most part) loved, and made me kind of really dislike them.  It made me dislike Inigo, Fezzik, Westley, and Buttercup.  Okay, I already disliked Buttercup, but I loved Inigo and Fezzik.  I swear I did, and by the end of the first chapter of Buttercup's Baby I hated Fezzik.

For those of you who don't already know, Buttercup's Baby is the announced but as of yet not actually completed sequel to The Princess Bride.  So far all that's been released of it is a sample chapter composed of the introduction and the first chapter, attached to the 25th and 30th anniversary editions of the book.  For the George R.R. Martin fan who is used to waiting for sequels to books the state of Buttercup's Baby should be almost comforting: the next A Song of Ice and Fire novel is going to be finished eventually, the next Princess Bride story, however, probably isn't.  To be honest, I'm really not going to be disappointed if Buttercup's Baby never takes any form beyond this first chapter.

In my review of The Princess Bride I wrote that Westley and Buttercup were in essence Mary Sues.  Things are just a bit too easy for them and they're a bit too perfect - or they're supposed to be.  In Buttercup's Baby Fezzik and Inigo seem to be determined to join the Mary Sue, especially following the birth of the titular baby, Waverly.  Sure the whole chapter sets up that Fezzik's about to die and thus fail at something, but the connection between Fezzik and Waverly is just.. it's lame.  Making things worse is the many inturruptions by Goldman himself.  While The Princess Bride was able to develop somewhat of a flow before Goldman began to interrupt himself here he just goes off, as if he has become overly obsessed with the sound of his own voice (metaphorically speaking, of course).  Thus, there's no real flow to the first chapter of Buttercup's Baby and as it all progresses you just can't help but cringe.  It's really just not enjoyable.

The Princess Bride

Author: William Goldman

Genre: Fantasy, Adventure, Romance, Comedy
Rating: B

"Life isn't fair. It's just fairer than death, that's all."

There’s a part of me that inherently feels bad for not giving The Princess Bride a higher rating.  In the almost thirty years since it was written it’s become a classic, and deservedly so.  It’s an amazing piece of comedic fantasy and an even more amazing piece of metafictional satire – in a way it’s a satire of books that are satires.  At the same time, however, the story itself is rather gimmicky, the threats to the protagonists are far too easily overcome, and William Goldman’s comments within the text can be a bit much.

At its core The Princess Bride is a story of true love: the beautiful Buttercup is in love with farm hand Westley, but a series of unfortunate events pulls them apart – he, presumably dead, is captured by the Dread Pirate Roberts and she is forcefully engaged to marry Prince Humperdinck, the heir to the Florin throne.  It’s also a story of friendship, as midway through the series of unfortunate events Buttercup is abducted by three men who all rather desperately need each other: the Sicilian criminal genius (Vizzini), the Spanish master swordsman (Inigo), and the Turkish giant (Fezzik).  Vizzini is a hunchback who seems to really need to have people around in order to be amazed at his genius; Inigo needs someone to tell  him what to do, although in his heart he longs to take vengeance on the six-fingered man who killed his father; and Fezzik fears being alone above all other things and longs for companionship.  There’s more to it than just this, however, as The Princess Bride is presented as an abridged version of a much longer book by the same name, written by S. Morgenstern. Goldman was read the story as a child by his father, who left out all the lengthy boring bits, and upon discovering that as an adult Goldman insisted on abridging his favourite novel with “just the good bits.”  Thus, the book has a lengthy introduction explaining Goldman’s backstory to the novel and is filled throughout with his own commentary, telling you where he’s cut out things and making references to the way his father told him the story the first time – and in one moment of sheer awesomeness saying that he wrote an additional scene for the novel, but his editor wouldn’t let him include it in the novel so if you write them they’ll send you the three page addition.  With one of the more recent releases of the books, this request can now be made online and an amusing letter regarding the scene will be sent to your email.  It’s actually a really good way of continuing the book that I have to give Goldman props for.

I do enjoy the story of Princess Bride, although whenever I read the text itself I can't help but feel that Goldman spends too much time providing the back story.  The story of how he decided to annotate the book is interesting and all, but it goes on for far too long, as do some of his commentary asides.  This is in contrast to the development of the characters, which is actually wanting.  I love Fezzik and Inigo, who Goldman does develop, but Buttercup and Westley are both kind of Mary Sues.  Goldman writes a lot that is supposed to act as development for the two, but really they both seem to just get by on naturally derived talent.  Buttercup is dumb as a post but amazingly beautiful and Westley is good at everything he does.  Everything.  The villans, however, are evil simply for the purpose of being evil.

The ending itself is a bit disappointing as well.  Despite the difficulties that overwhelm the characters everything seems to just fall into place for them.  They seem to win not because of any real thing that they do but because they have to.  It all just seems a bit too easy, a bit too simple, a bit too contrived.  It may just be that I know the story too well, and as such any suspense is removed.  I'm not entirely sure.

Week in Review: July 29 - August 4

Movies - This week we started our James Bond review, with Dr. No and From Russia With Love.  I've been informed that Sean Connery is the best of the James Bonds and that these two movies are the best of the series, which means that it's all down hill from here.  New movie of the week was Savages.  This is another one of those weeks when I'm not sure just what was the best movie... probably From Russia.

Books - There were two books of the week, in a way.  We finished off the anthology Lord John and the Hand of Devils, by Diana Gabaldon, with the novella "Lord John and the Haunted Soldier."

TV - TV show of the week was the second season of Downton Abbey.  While not as good as the first season, this is definitely one of the best things on TV right now.

Recommendations - The only new movie that I've recommended this week is Total Recall, the Colin Farrell remake of the original Arnold Schwarzenegger film.  What can I say, it's a slow week for new movies.

Next Week - Next week we'll be continuing the James Bond-a-thon with Goldfinger, then starting a Total Recall-a-thon; I'll be doing both the new film, which was released on Friday, as well as the original.  To round off the week, there's the new Step Up movie, Step Up Revolution. 

Requests - Anything out there that you'd like me to review?  A book? A movie? A TV show?  Let me know in the comments and I'll try to get to it.

Downton Abbey (Season 2)

Starring: Hugh Bonneville, Jessica Brown Findlay, Laura Carmichael, Jim Carter, Brendan Coyle, Michelle Dockery, Siobhan Finneran, Joanne Froggatt, Thomas Howes, Rob James-Collier, Phyllis Logan, Elizabeth McGovern, Sophie McShera, Lesley Nicol, Maggie Smith, Dan Stevens, Penelope Wilton, Amy Nuttall

Creator: Julian Fellowes

Genre: Period Drama

Rating: A-

While not entirely as awesome as the first season of Downton Abbey, the second season still manages to be one of the best shows on TV.  The big problem with this season is simply that it moves too fast – it’s rather clear that the show runners were eager to get out of the war as quickly as possible – but despite that I still think it managed to treat at least most of its plots fairly well, and still succeeded in keeping you on your toes as to what is going to happen with your favourite characters.

The season starts in 1916, with the Battle of the Somme, and ends in 1918 with the 1918 Spanish flu pandemic. With few exceptions all the original cast are back, and the viewers get to see what happens to Downton during the Great War. The Earl (Bonneville) is struggling with finding a place in the new world that is emerging around him; he’s very firmly attached to the identity that he had before the war and is unable to find a useful role during the war. His wife and daughters are each struggling to do similar, in their own way, as the Countess (McGovern) deals with the idea of turning Downton into a convalescent for the local hospital, Lady Edith (Carmichael) learns to drive and begins to fill in for the missing men in the town and cares for wounded officers, Lady Sybil (Brown Findlay) becomes, more political, and develops feelings for chauffer Tom Branson (Allen Leech), and Lady Mary (Dockery) … well, Mary gets engaged to Sir Richard Carlisle (Ian Glen), while still pining for Matthew (Stevens), who’s gone to war and gotten engaged. Isobel (Wilton) is pretty much set about making life difficult for the Countess, causing her and the Dowager Countess (Smith) to team up and work against her. Amongst the staff, Thomas (James-Collier) has gone to war as a doctor; William (Howes) wants to go to war but has promised his father he won’t; Anna (Froggatt) and Bates (Coyle) are desperate to get married, despite the many obstacles to do so presented by the current Mrs. Bates (Maria Doyle Kennedy); Carson (Carter) and Mrs. Hughes (Logan) are trying to keep the household together; and new maid Ethel (Nuttall) is a bit of a bitch and kind of a whore.

The big problem with this season is that it takes on too much and moves too fast.  While time doesn't pass too much faster here than it did in season one (with each covering about two years) it feels like it is.  There are a lot more plots going on here and it really seems like some things are just randomly dropped.  So much of the first season was based on the (very simple) plot of Mary needing to get married upstairs and the addition of Mr. Bates downstairs.  This time round there's a lot more going on and, to the disadvantage of the overall tone of the show, a lot of plots seemed to be rather quickly abandoned.  Just a few of the plots are a bit contrived too, taking you out of the delicate realism that is the show.  The further into the season things get the more soap opera-y it gets.

The acting, however, is still good, and while the show does add on a gazillion additional plots the focus really is still Mary, Matthew, and Mr. Bates. Of all the different directions that the show takes in this season, I still love how it remains about that core.  Some of the things that they do with Bates are a bit over the top, as are some of the things that they do with Matthew, but the overall story is still there.  It wasn't the best season, but it could have been a lot worse.

Recommendations: August 3

Total Recall - Did you know that Elizabeth Taylor once called Colin Farrell the reincarnation of Richard Burton?  His movies might not always be good, but I do have to say I always find them to be pretty enjoyable, so I'm looking forward to this remake of the 1990 Arnold Schwarzenegger film.

That's kind of it, actually.  Sorry.

Total Recall - the Mind-Bending Edition has been released on Blu-Ray this week, presumably to try to cash in on the remake's release.  How can you really go wrong with a classic Arnold film?

The Seven Year Itch - There's a kick to put classic films on Blu-Ray lately, and this week the focus seems to be on Marilyn Monroe movies.  There are five being re-released this week, with Seven Year Itch being my favourite of the bunch.

Pete Smalls Is Dead - Okay, so I've never actually heard of this movie before and it's rating on IMDb isn't exactly the best (it's scored exactly 5.0).  But, it stars Lena Headey and Peter Dinklage.  Just Dinklage alone is enough to get me to see a movie, but the combination of his Game of Thrones counterpart makes this something that I need to see, 5.0 rating or not.

Tara Road - In commemoration of the passing of author Maeve Binchy I'm recommending Tara Road, the only work of hers that I've ever actually read.  The novel is about two women, one Irish the other American, who decide to escape their problems by trading houses, despite never having actually met.  It's kind of like The Holiday, but better.

From Russia with Love (1963)

Starring: Sean Connery, Daniela Bianchi, Lotte Lenya, Robert Shaw, Pedro Armendáriz

Director: Terence Young

Genre: Action, Adventure, Thriller

Rating: B+

I enjoyed the second instalment in the James Bond franchise more than the first one. It's still a bit simple, but there's an improvement on the bad guys in general.  It's definitely still misogynist, but the fact that the women in this film are at least semi-villainous as well as sex interests makes the way that they're treated somehow acceptable.  Somehow, Bond (Connery) is less of a dick in this movie, fully embracing the awesomeness that is 007.

Following the death of Dr. No SPECTRE decides that it wants to extract revenge on Bond.   Chief Planning Officer Kronsteen (Vladek Sheybal) devices a plan to steal a Lektor cryptographic device from the Soviets, sell it back to them, and get Bond killed.  Ex-SMERSH operative and current SPECTRE operative Number 3 Rosa Klebb (Lenya) is put in charge of the operation and recruits Red Grant (Shaw) to assassinate Bond and Tatiana Romanova (Bianchi) to lure Bond into the trap.

I think a big part of the reason why I liked From Russia with Love more than Dr. No was because the plot was more readily defined.  Right at the start we were told what was going on and why - we saw Number 1 (voiced by Eric Pohlmann), who from my understanding becomes the great villain of the series.  SPECTRE became something that was real instead of something that seemed like little more than the idea of some lunatic villain.  It all became more defined and real.

My favourite part of this movie, however, had to be the fact that I wasn't able to predict where it would go.  Sure, I knew that Bond was going to survive - it's hard to not know that when you realize that there's another 21 movies left in the series - but I didn't know the how.  I enjoyed the journey that brought me to the how.  I'm not really sure what more to say; it's been a long week so far, and I think my brain might be a little fried.

Savages (2012)

Starring: Taylor Kitsch, Blake Lively, Aaron Johnson, John Travolta, Benicio del Toro, Salma Hayek, Demián Bichir

Director: Oliver Stone

Genre: Crime, Drama, Thriller

Rating: B-

While watching Savages I found that if you suspend your disbelief surrounding the plot and characters it’s actually a pretty good movie.  Definitely not Oliver Stone’s best, but far from being his worst either.  There were a lot of elements about the plot that kind of confused me a bit, mostly in regards to character motivations, but once I let the journey take me on its course it was a fun little trip.  Weird and rather unexpected, but definitely fun.

Savages tells the story of Ben (Taylor-Johnson) and Chon (Kitsch), best friends and marijuana growers, and their girlfriend O (Lively).  While Chon was in the armed forces he smuggled marijuana seeds into the US from Afghanistan and since then he and Ben have grown a particularly potent strain that is in high demand.  It is this strain that brings them to the attention of cartel leader Elena (Hayek) and her thugs, Alex (Bichir) and Lado (del Toro).  Elena tries to buy out their business, but after Ben and Chon insult her and make plans to flee the country she has O kidnapped in order to make them toe the line.  From there things all go to shit as Ben and Chon attempt to find a way to get O back.

For starters, I really enjoyed the way that Stone shot this movie. He kind of balances the tone between being some Hollywood flick to being an artsy film with a point – I’m not certain if Savages really has a deeper message, but it presents itself as if it does. I enjoyed the narrative that Blake Lively’s character provides, especially given as it’s preceded by the note that even though she’s telling us the story it doesn’t mean that she’s alive in the end. We kind of lose the narration in the middle, which is probably for the best, but it comes back in the end and I think provides a good wrap to the story. It’s weird… this is not a really deep movie, but between the way it was shot, with the variety of angles and the different angles, and the tone that the narration takes it really feels like it’s making some profound statement. I was almost left with the feeling at the end that I needed to rewatch the movie just to figure out what that statement was, but at the same time felt as though I didn’t really miss anything by not having grasped that statement.

Actually, that's somewhat of a lie.  I did get an idea as to what the some of the statements that Stone was attempting to make, although I'm not really sure of them.  There was a lot, obviously, on drugs, but I wasn't exactly sure if Savages was supposed to be anti-drugs or not.  Likewise, I wasn't sure if he was trying to be anti-violence or not - there are some characters in the cartel that you like and others that you don't, while Chon is very much in favour of violence and yet it's Ben, the pacifist, that you spend the entire time wanting to die.  Or that's how I felt about him, but regardless it's his pacifist actions that cause many of the problems.  In the end, though, I think it's the statement that acts as the problem of the movie.  Stone is trying to say something in Savages but the way he presents his message is rather convoluted and confusing, so at the end you're not really sure what it is that he's trying to say.  While there are some great works out there that do such a thing magnificently - Shakespeare comes to mind - there isn't much magnificence to Savages.  The message is lost simply because of a poor direction, or script, or something.  I'm not really sure where, I just know that the film probably would have been better without it.